theexposer
The Exposer- Exposing Online Predators Who Prey on Vulnerable Adults- Expose Yours: EXPOSER@37.COM
BROKEN GLASS: A story of personal revelation
relationshipEver seen the signs on the wall of big buildings?
IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS!
That is how it feels when you come forward to expose a predator. It is not a easy thing to do. It exposes your own naivete and foolishness... but it also reopens the wounds. However, both things are vitally necessary.
Let me use the following story to illustrate:
Here's a victim's story who came face to face with two predators; once as a child and again as a adult. Both different and both the same.
As a child he got to me through my church and purposely became friends with my parents. He stalked me when I walked home from school and knew my every schedule.
A man that passed himself off as ten years younger than he was.
The phone calls became horrible as I was told things I had no business hearing at the age I was. Why didn't I speak up? Why didn't I tell someone? I still ask myself this. Probably because I didn't know any better.
I will let you do the math. When my parents were out for a evening one night my nightmare began. There was no way I was going to let anyone know this.
I made myself believe it never happened. I remember it as if I was watching it happen to someone else. I did try to fight. But couldn't break free.
I lived with the memory for years and talked with counselors. Eventually I just put it away in my mind and figured I would never to revisit it again.
This past dark hidden secret created a place in me. I formed boundaries that I kept throughout the years. I didn't become attracted to men the same as other women. I had to know that I was safe. I had to have trust. I had to be convinced that they cared about me. It was going to be the real deal or no deal. Unfortunately - I was still wounded.
That mentality did keep me pure. It kept me safe for a while. It made me very good at listening to my instincts about people. But then I met a different sort of person. A destructive narcissist.
Twenty years later from that traumatic experience I became friends with a man a lot older than me. Because of my prior experience, what I didn't realize was that I WAS STILL VULNERABLE. I had the kind of vulnerability men like him smell like sharks smell blood. I was wounded. I was naive. I'd hit a breaking point in my life. This person knew. Predators always HUNT THE WOUNDED
This person I thought was my friend and a sympathetic ear ended up being a predator. A wolf in sheep's clothing.
In retrospect, he used the SAME tactics as my previous predator. Because I had no told and had done what everyone expected me to: "just move on"... "get over it"... "don't think about it"... I was used to those tactics. I didn't know they weren't NORMAL. Or that he was violating my weak boundaries.
The only difference is that he did not physically abuse me. But he did physically USE me.
This person created what he made me believe was a "relationship" with me. He made me think he was my sympathizer in the midst of my pain.
There were red flags in the beginning. But his false sincerity and plausible explanations struck my compassionate nature and I did not walk away. This grew into a deep intense emotionally intimate relationship for me. The red flags were flying at me from all directions but I was blinded by him. For him - it was all false. All a game.
I had the information, but I had pushed it into a corner in my mind.
He used my own pain and my own mind against me. He followed all the seduction tactics.
Not only that but he blame shifted everything on to me and devalued me as a person with his condemnations.
The brainwashing and mental manipulation he used on me while knowing full well my personal situation was in trouble. Like all predators, played on my trust in him and caused me to go into a whirlwind of confusion. As abused and used women do, I tried to get answers from him and he treated me like a child. Talked down to me.
Nothing like luring you into a web, sucking your blood and then leaving you to figure out how to get out. A typical destructive narcissist.
Then I found that for him the whole thing was PRETEND. It was a set up and I'm just one of many others that fell for the same trap. In all victims there is the a common denominator of emotional & personal vulnerability. Prey.
Then he confirms what I am to him. Nothing. Zero.
Time To Take A Stand!
I believe now that it was planned because of his mental illness and issues with women. He appears to be a destructive narcissist and a sex addict who sees all women as objects for him to use and throw away.
Predators are liars!
They don't suffer the painful emotional torment as their victims. It is ridiculous to them. They can't feel and they certainly can't love - NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY.
Their motto is move on to the next "blood supply" - like a vampire.
While the victim suffers usually severe emotional trama the predator moves on to his next target and carries on with his game.
I had to relive pain from my childhood because I was lied to so he could use me.
He was my enemy all along. He's no one's friend.
___________________________________________________
LET THE OTHER VICTIMS KNOW THE TRUTH!
HELP OTHER VICTIMS SPEAK OUT - THEY ARE NOT ALONE!
HELP OTHER VICTIMS SPEAK OUT - THEY ARE NOT ALONE!
THE EXPOSER
Take Your Power Back!
exposer@37.com
No replies - reply
The Exposer
Links
8 Easy Ways To Spot an Emotional Manipulator
Add to Technorati Favorites
Add Your Blog
Blogging Fusion
Brad Dorsky
Cheaters News
CREATIVE COMMONS LICENSE
Dan Jacoby
Doug Beckstead, Predator
Ed Hicks aka Charles Hicks aka Charles Greene
Emotional Abuse & Your Faith
Emotional Abusers
Exposing Online Predators
Fight Bigamy
Gareth Rodger
Give Me Closure
How to NOT Apologize When You've Seriously Messed Up!
How To Spot a Dangerous Man
Jerks Who F**k With Your Mind
John Gash
Joseph 'Jay' Cafasso - A Call for Information
LISSA DALY - Exposed @EOPC
Monster Love: Stories of Online Spiritual/Sexual Predators
Never Date Him!
Pedia on Pathology & Psychopathology
Peep Sheets
Phil Haberman - Predator/ Con Man
RUN YOUR MOUTH ABOUT IT
Safe Relationships
Sammy Benoit aka Yidwithlid aka gridney
Stop the Act
Take Back the Tech - Protecting Yourself Online
The Stumbling Block
Understanding Sex Addiction
What Makes Narcissists Tick
When Mr. Right Turns Out to Be Mr. Wrong
WildXAngel - Online Predators
Women Who Love Psychopaths
Yes I Was The Stumbling Block
You Are A Target
You Think He'll Be Different With You?
